I have a very vicious independent streak in me, for most of my late teens and early 20s I was endlessly dismissive of any as being capable of helping me in any fashion, not that I now doubt my skills, but I am a bit more wise and fully see the value of talking to others to get different viewpoints of a matter – namely because I realized how locked in my thoughts were and to encourage divergent thinking. This is kind of like the whole manosphere, were men rarely agree on things, but you are exposed to people who clearly think about things, and you are forced to either re-evaluate what you believe, or at least truly question what you think.
Men as a group as systematically raised to NOT seek others help for things that matter, I think this is likely purposeful and leads us to be taken advantage of easily. Understand what I am saying: girls routinely talk to each other about their problems, and come to answers guys never do ‘going it alone’, whereas guys going alone have only one source of information: the collective – so of course their conclusions will often be wrong. Example 1: the complete failure of men with women in everything to dating to staying with bpd women, how white knightism is encouraged, and can never figure anything out.
We get caught in bad relationships and the ONLY thing we know how to do is what society told us to do ‘man up’ and stay with the bitch or damaging girl, or to ‘man up’ and prove your loyalty to some cuckolding bitch and somehow so how great you are and make her come back to you.
When I was getting destroyed by my bpd girl, most of my ‘friends’ didn’t give a shit and wouldn’t talk to me, I had one guy I became good friends with (we since fell apart due to something else) but we actually talked about girls, and it was insane how productive it was – this was before I found the manosphere but same idea. We could see things from different perspectives, talk about ‘does this really work?’ and so on, it helped so tremendously to transcend the false world we find ourselves.
I have a friend now we talk philosophy about, about how America is an endless aristocracy, how democracy if not completely rigged than serves the same purpose of controlling the masses by offering no real choices, how corporatism is the biggest threat…and when I tell others I TALK to someone else raise a suspicious eye because people just don’t talk anymore. That’s exactly how they want it. If you aren’t talking to others, then they get to talk to you: through the tv, through rigged media, through porn, through football etc etc.
I highly encourage trying to find people who are divergent thinkers and engage them in conversation, it doesn’t matter if they believe something totally different, because you can both see why you believe something, and maybe hear something you never considered, and at the very least to question your own beliefs, and you will likely find what I did – so many you have held really are insubstantial and require a new valuation. A new way to truly see life instead of the packaged view you have been ‘gifted’.