Ethically torn

Despite my hard pro-MGTOW preaching, I actually think about this option a lot.

I am torn between in my mind the ideal society we could be, and the fucked up reality we live in.

I am torn when I see nurses helping blind or burned children and I want to protect this society that helps the weak, but then I turn around and see fem-cunt lesbians man hating and systematically ruining everything men built.

I am torn when I think that pulling out of society is a cowardly thing to do and is giving up, but then I view to support the monolithic entity is the height or irrationality.

I am torn by my loves for animals yet wishing for a SHTF/apocalypse so that we can rebuild from this nightmare.

I am torn between my gentle heart that is constantly ravaged by the world, and the reality that I have to be ‘hard’ lest I pay in more pain.

I am torn between that I actually never wanted to hate women, I really wanted to protect them, and the facts that most women deserve their hate and claim they are just fine in this bubble-bound illusion we call society.

I am torn between if you do not fight against something you acquiesce it, and the reality that one person makes little difference.

Lastly, I am torn because I thought I was supposed to get smarter as I got older, and all I have is more questions.

Why the MGTOW movement can not be stopped – Disorganized Resistance

Disorganized resistance

Disorganized Resistance – a phenomenon where independent groups or people come to the same conclusions/actions against others.  This is my own definition. 

This is a military thing, as to their official term of it, I have no idea, but it is basically the idea that if you are conquered or under attack and there is no leader, there is still a resistance because individuals act of the own violation.  The military is a hierarchy, A commands B, who commands C, A dies, and suddenly there are problems.  In a DR model, you can kill or stop whoever, and the resistance goes on.

DR is by its nature nearly impossible to stomp out, as everyone has to be killed, because even individuals will resist.  Notice some similarities here to Iraq/Afghanistan?  We routinely take out ‘leaders’ yet the fight goes on.  It is because the people feel it in their hearts to resist, and will continue to do so.

Now…how does MGTOW fit into all this?  IT IS A DISORGANIZED RESISTANCE MODEL!

It is men (like me) coming to the conclusion that society has utterly fucked them, and that the ‘deal’ we are supposed to take is not worth it, and instead simply do not take the deal. Certain more passionate or angry ‘rebels’ will take to talking to friends, starting blogs etc…see where this is going?  There is no MGTOW leader, there are merely voices out there that others listen to, but you can’t pull a coup d-ete and end the movement.

This is the beauty of it, it is nearly unstoppable.  Consider the Japanese ‘herbivore’ movement ( is there a lead male telling guys to stop giving ungrateful girls gifts, and instead use their money on video games and having fun?  No, but it is a HUGE social movement, that the government is trying to stop.

The MGTOW movement is a subset of the whole ‘manosphere’ which basically is a set of various cries against female behavior (in pua case, they simply manipulate it for sex, but still admit the fucked up nature of the world), and even with the rampant censoring happening (did you know facebook routinely blocks/bans anti feminist speech?  So much for a discussion…) the movement continues on.

It presses on because it cannot be stopped.  It is a rationale reaction to what is happening, so even if the average guy never learns ‘mgtow’ or finds it online, he slows understands that the deal he is presented with is pretty raw.  His fwb and part time job is fine for him etc.

The beauty is, even if ‘leaders’ are killed/taken out/banned nothing changes, new leaders pop up.  In the interest of documenting where I came from, so that some day someone might use my own info, the first mgtow-like sites were a which the guy advocated living life on your own terms, but was slightly PUA, the purest and oldest MGTOW is as far as I can tell.  He has been gone about a month, hopefully he isnt gone.  Stoner with a boner is also been around a long time and I consider him an early predecessor. M3 was the first time I heard mgtow referenced, and got in on the scene about a year before me, he has a girl now, and hasn’t been seen since. (MRA!?)  Current blogger Lu Bu is keeping the MGTOW movement alive.

Now, say wordpress bows to eventual pressure taking down these sites…a blow but the battle is not over.  It does not matter how much they try to stop it, BECAUSE IT IS A RESULT THAT IS COME TO RATIONALLY.  Guys will continue to become MGTOW whether they know it or not, and while the girls get fatter and bitchier our disorganized ranks will continue to swell.

We cant be stopped.

What is MGTOW?

MGTOW- Men Going Their Own Way

I get a lot of traffic for MGTOW and am one of the few hard MGTOW proponents, so I offer a short primer to any new readers about what this is.  A few short points before I go into details.

MGTOW is a counter movement that is in response to the completely unfair and one-sided society we find ourselves in, it is a response to the entitlement of modern women, and it is a personal empowerment movement.

It is related, but different from two similar things: PUAs (pick up artists) and MRA (Men Rights Activist).

What is MGTOW not?  It is not guys who are gay (though they certainly can be), it is not guys who have never had sex/losers and rationalize their plight (many are actually quite successful), and it is certainly NOT pro-feminist.


MGTOW is typically a guy that decide either through personal experiance or that of others, that the system is stacked pretty damn hard against him, and that the ‘rewards’ soceity confers upon those that follow the protocols are rather hollow, and not worth the sacrafice needed.

It is here there is some overlap with PUA/MRA.  PUAs treat girls like shit, that is the long and short of it, and girls by and large like this ‘social mastery’, PUAs do this for one goal only: sex.  Thats fine if thats your thing, but here is where it is similar to MGTOW, most MGTOW dont really give a shit about girls either, most are self-entitled, in positions they should not have been in other than that they are female, etc.  Typically a MGTOW is not going to insult a girl in a flirting way (to have sex with her) he might just for fun, or more likely not even care she is alive.  MGTOW is not necessarily an asexual movement, the MGTOW just realizes the chase is not worth the reward.  (A few minutes of sex).  MGTOW actually can be damn successful in regard to girls: because they dont care – and thats a huge key to social competence.

On a society perspective, MGTOW is similar to MRA, MRAs are HUGE into the real inequality males face, not this bullshit about ‘wage gap’ which is utterly false.  MRA talk about things like child custody going to the women in all but the most extreme cases, they talk about things like marriage and how in a divorce (most are started by women) the man loses so much more.  The system itself is set up as a proxy alpha-male, they provide the women resources, they provide protection, and thus take away two major roles the male provides – leaving women to do what they would do in such a situation: slut around without commitment.

MRA have some pretty legitimate points, and the PUA have some good social moves, but MGTOW goes beyond both.  They realize the game is rigged against us, and we also realize the things it takes to completely dominate a girl, but we go beyond that, we live for ourselves. We decide ‘I really want to write a book’ or ‘I really want to go climb 50 mountains’ or ‘I want to see the world’.  And they go do it.  They are not enslaved (or attempt to minimize their enslavement) and do things like realize that working for 12$/hr and most of that going to daddy-government is a bad idea so rather live for themselves.

It is self-empowerment, typically they well be more well-read, more athletic, and eventually more life experience- they are not enslaved to sex like the PUA.  To ‘betas’ still plugged in, it may seem like some sort of escapist movement or something, why would ANYONE not want to go get married to their highschool sweetheart they meet 10 years later, and work themselves to death for her ungrateful ass, and what, she is cheating on you with some PUA guy she meet on a vacation?  Well, its just cause you weren’t nice enough to her, I’m sure.

MGTOW is about living life on your own terms.  It is about minimizing contact with a completely broken and corrupt system, and choosing this contact on your own terms.  If you do not want to deal with fat bitches who think they are goddesses, then you dont.  If you see a nice girl who is cute (a rarity!) you can go talk to her.  It is YOUR life.  Live for yourself, not chasing pussy, or tilting at windmills.  The irony of ‘pulling out’ of society in general, is if you do have interest in girls you actually will be more attractive, as you come off as the wanderer badass who doesnt have time for her shit.

Men ‘pull out’ of a girl during sex to avoid being trapped by her with a kid, MGTOW ‘pull out’ of society to avoid being trapped by it with the multitude of traps laid to ruin your life into a wage serf for women.

Billions of stars out there, dont bother getting caught up on petty life details

OkCupid pt3

I was trolling through okc to see if there were any hot girls on here (occasionally there are, but posing as a hot girl myself I know its nearly a impossible prey to slay, and that they are just ego whores to the max.)

So I’m wondering which of these girls is deserving…and I come across this gem:


Main pic is girl on girl action to titillate male attention?  Check

Not so subtle grrlll-power? Check

Pretending you are actually doing shit with your life? Check

Subconscious desire to have NSA sex with someone that makes her feel good? Check

I particularly like the ‘good vibes/good times’ line to me, that is so utterly blatant that it is her fall back excuse for why she did or did not have sex with the guy on the first date.  “He just didn’t make me feel good, he had weird vibes” or “we just totally connected, he had great vibes!” as his dick still sticks in her memory.

Oh, a part lower on her profile:

The first thing people notice about me:

The “big eyes” on my chest

Now, I am not sure if this is some weird reference to some anatomical feature, but it is really beside the point, basically anytime someone has to TELL you what their most obvious feature is, and it isnt something humorous it shows deep seated insecurity (but what girl doesnt have that?)  Its like a guy answering ‘my six pack’.

Btw, this girl does not have a particularly nice chest, very typical, she is lacking but still wants to believe she somehow is not.


What is next in this series? 1, 4, 10, 19, 31, _

her- 36


I dont expect you to be a math genius, but to get a question like this so obviously wrong is not good for long term prospective.  OK, you dont get that its +3 more every time, fine, but to think the increase is LESS than the prior step shows an inability to grasp simple patterns around you.

I always like looking at the ‘sex’ tab of questions, idk if girls are just stupid, but the stuff they put on here is insane, its typical to find a girl admitting bisexual hookups, 3 ways, into bdsm, etc while in her profile says she is a ‘private’ person.

Tattoos on a woman’s lower back are…



Remember, my profile was meant to be pretty whorish, that being said, girls with back tattooes are whores, plain and simple.  It is not you being creative or individual etc.  Your fellow girls may be deceived, most guys are not.

Divide your age by 2. Have you had sex with at least that many people?

her Yes

me Yes

See the stuff people admit?  Sure they could lie, but most would lie in the opposite direction.  This girl is 23 by the way.


Could you have respect for someone after having sex with them on the first meeting/date?

her Maybe, depending upon the circumstances.

Maybe, if the vibes were good

Say you’ve started seeing someone you really like. As far as you’re concerned, how long will it take before you have sex?

her 3-5 dates

This one is interesting, clearly we know she is down with ONS, but this answer suggests she is starting to subconsciously see the writing on the wall about her own Wall future.  She has to slow down to find a ‘nice guy’, and nice guys get sex after multiple dates, never anytime soon.  This answer inadvertedly shows a lot of what manosphere has been saying about alpha/beta dynamics, and how women will ride cock late teens and early 20s and start slowing down to find a provider.

You’re in a new relationship and your partner admits that they have had 14 sexual partners. Does that sound like a lot to you?

her I guess, but It doesn’t change how I feel.

Ahh, hypocrisy in action, she has at least 12 herself (unless she does not know how to divide 23 by 2. and came out with the answer of ‘1’) A show on the other foot…and this feminist seems to not like it when the guy did what she has done.

Btw, I am literally seeing these for the first time, going through her profile and seeing this.

Do you enjoy meaningless sex?

her- No I used to but it’s exactly how it sounds. Meaningless sooner or later and I get bored.

nearing-the-Wall…how brutal

Would you consider sleeping with someone on the first date?

her No

It is inconsistencies like this that make me think the average girl is completely incapable of logic. (yes we know they are driven by emotion, but do they not possess ANY logic?)  How can she say on one hand if the vibes are right, or that she might still respect someone if had sex on the first date (she lost control undoubtedly!) to then later say ‘no’ to first date sex?

What this is, is pretty easy emotional psychology going on here.  Its like asking someone ‘are you a slut?’ slut has such bad feelings about it, so ‘no!’ they arent a slut. ‘Will you have sex the first date?’ well, that would be slutty, and I am not a slut so ‘no!’.    But then rephrase the question ‘you had a great nice with a fun guy last night, and it ended intimately, would you still respect the guy?’ Notice what I did there, the same fact still happened: sex on first date, but suddenly that is not the focus, the focus in on the great time and the OTHER GUY, certainly we know this girl (and most) would say yes to this situation.  Because ‘its different’.  Right.

This is the same kind of emotional-‘logic’ that leads to false rapes, it was great if they like the guy, it was rape if they have regret in the morning.  Pay attention males, female hypocrisy is everywhere if you merely look, and this hypocrisy can fuck up your life if you misstep.

Why I write

Initially I had a lot of rage that I wanted to get off my chest, and as my readers know sometimes some of my posts are still angry, but that is not the reason I write. 

To sum it succinctly: ‘all truths that are kept silent become poisonous’ – Thus Spoke Zarathustra

We have this perverse backward, truth hiding society that actively subverts dialogue and dissension.  For example, one of my major reader Sophia and I do not agree on everything, but on this blog we DISCUSS matters, unlike society at large where any question of women instantly marginalizes you and somehow casts you as a loser/cant get any/NAWALT.

I went through a very fucked up relationship with a girl I am convinced had (has) histrionic personality disorder, or BPD, I was hurt bad, but it forced me to reevaluate so much.  Nothing was left off the table.  As a began my new quest of knowledge, I could not believe how many guys I found with similar stories.  I got of ‘light’ compared to some of these guys who were married, had kids, lost half their wealth, owes payments etc.  It was a warning to me that this was not a game.  I got off with a mind-fucking, but my body and finances were left intact, seeing some of these guys stories, all I could think was ‘holy fuck man, there is this whole hidden world no one mentions and no one admits might be true.’

I write partly because it is a bit of a journal-like practice, that I could look back and see where I have come. (if wordpress doesnt delete all ‘hate’ blogs against feminists)  I write because I am devoted to the truth, no matter how dark or how much we may not like it.  When I see people like militant feminists who willingly deny the truth, willingly hide and obfuscate the truth, and 98% believe their own lies!

I grew up skeptical, and if you want me to believe something, convince me, show me some shit or bring up some points as to why I should believe you.  (Btw if you know anything about MBTI or cognitive functions, I am a super Thinking Introverted – meaning things like the external consensus can go to hell because they very well could be wrong)  So clearly feminism and I would not get along when their entire premise is ‘accept what I say, and if you question you are just angry at women/wish you could get laid/NAWALT’.  Why the fuck can we not discuss the susposed ‘wage gap’ and that its a lie, and that women work easier jobs, and take more time off?  Why can we not talk about that the laws and courts are rigged so fucking against males, that males have been forced to stop talking to girls for fear of the system taking them down?  Why cant we talk about our supposed ‘slut shaming’ yet also we cant talk about the insanity of false rape charges who are often just girls with morning regret?  Man, if you want to send girls off their rocker, just mention ‘guys dont like fat girls’ or ‘I think a lot of rapes are girls with regret’ and my god, they are ready to crucify you.  Why the fuck are you so defensive, if it is so obviously wrong, wouldnt the argument fail on its own merit?  Unless…their was some truth to it, and that it is in their interest in keeping truth suppressed and keeping discussion silent.  Afterall, if the word spreads too much, feminists will collapse on their own lack of merit, thus they have to stop anyone questioning them at any cost.




Live for yourself (MGTOW)…dont be a PUA

A scene of a mgtow, a pua would never

One thing I want to include off the bat, is it is interesting that a lot of the noveau-pua do not even call themselves pua, and pretend they are something different, I am talking about nearly every pickup blog that are proclaimed MGTOWs, heartitse and his ilk.  Do they have great information that will help you get women?  Without a doubt…but that is all it really is, something to feed an endless sexual addiction.

What is also interesting is that there is a VERY large hatred for MGTOW guys in this blogsphere, and if you think about it this hatred likely stems from subconscious inklings they either know we are right, or feel guilty they are not as discplined.  Consider this as evidence:  for all intents they SHOULD NOT CARE WE ARE ALIVE after all we both agree women are conniving bitches, that ‘confidence’ will get you laid, to not act like a chump, to not grovel, so in this regard we agree.  Further, a lot of MGTOWs either completely pull out of the dating market, or partial pull out (the pull out method!) and for this reason alone the pua type should have no hatred because we are not even in competition with them!

Ahh…but wait…are we in competition?  Think about this carefully, and the hatred for mgtow out of them all starts to make sense.  For ‘not caring about women’ don’t puas – and remember I am talking about both old pua and the new pua that are the same general idea just dont call themselves that- dont these puas spend a LOT OF FUCKING TIME doing things to impress these girls they routinely shit on?  They talk about ‘maximizing dominance’ and ‘raising testosterone’ and developing a ‘social style’ for what?  Just to have some girls to fuck!  They are slaves to the very thing they hate, and they can not see their own hypocrisy, they are as bad as the women they routinely bash.

Here is a way we are in competition, imagine a job setting, you have a real pua and a real mgtow, they each possess at least some level of social competence.  The pua is going to be coming with style, and flirting etc…because he is a slave to his own sexual desire and is not even honest with himself.  He combs his hair for ‘social dominance’ not linking it to just hoping some girl will take his dick.  The mgtow is not, he does not give a shit.  He does not GIVE A FUCK if that dumb whore at his work even notices him.  Why?  Because he lives for himself.

So at the office the girl is going to be getting lines from the pua like ‘you have a good face for bangs’ and the mgtow is not going to say anything. But you know what, there is beyond a 0% chance this girl becomes intrigued, why isn’t this guy like all the rest?  She may even try flirting with him, and he will merely look at her with a ‘wtf are you doing?’ face and go back to whatever.  Now the weekend is coming. pua: ‘I can tell by your athletic breasts you stay busy during the weekend, how about you come with me to john’s bar?’ Now, here I fully grant some girls will say yes.  But some wont, some might go ask the quiet guy who just doesnt seem to care she is alive ‘hey, me and some friends are going out, do you want to come?’ mgtow ‘no (for added style he could just end it here) I am writing/rock climbing/ riding/ etc this weekend, bye.’

Because here is the irony…pua claim and claim ‘dont give a shit about the girl’ so they act like it…but they dont believe it.  They can de-humanize the girl as much as they want into a walking pussy..but they like that pussy, so they need the girl.  They are merely pretending they dont like her, because at its root they like at least one part of her.  The MGTOW truly does not care, he does not have to ‘tell’ her this through negs or anything either.  He doesnt need her for intellectual stimulation, and does not need her pussy, therefore she is useless to him, a true uselessness unlike the pua ‘claimed’ uselessness.

Who is the more ‘real’ person here, the guy claiming he is learning social dominance and hoops through all these hoops JUST TO GET A FUCK, or the guy who does not try to impress anyone and lives the life he wants?  The guy more interested in having a build physique so he can attract girls or the guy who trains so he has strength for his own pursuits?  The guy who reads ‘how to fuck a women in 1 hour’ pretending sex is not really his only measure of success, or the guy reading history or philosophy to see where we have come from?

I have heard the claim (most often leveled at men right activists – MRA) that ‘mgtow are just one girl/one blowjob/one sex away from being a pua’  I think this claim has some validity actually, but only for those guys that are not really mgtow, that they fell into the movement for the wrong reasons.

The few times I used my new found pua skillz to go hook up with girls it was…painfully easy, but you know what?  I literally felt worse.  I remember one girl who I had sex with for 4 hours, and man could she suck a mean one, after I left I was outside looking up at the sky and thinking ‘what the fuck am I doing with my life?’  A lot of people live lives of quiet desperation, and often this never surfaces beyond subtle cues in the brain, mainly because it is drugged into submission through drinking, sex etc.  I am going to say it bluntly, in about 99% of times ‘social drinking’ is merely a fucked up social convention to universally hide everyone’s collective pain of misled lives.

Our lives are transient, so we want to convince ourselves there was some point or something mattered, it is so pitiful that a notch count is what guys go for – all the while claiming ‘its not what I really want’.  Pitiful, but pathetic.

In retrospect it is obvious why puas would hate mgtow so much.  MGTOW represent something the pua can never become – a real man.  Someone that lives for his own purpose, not a purpose ultimately tied to fucking a girl.

If we could, would we ‘hack’ ourselves better lives?

I have been thinking (ha, isnt this how a lot of my posts start?) for a long time about RPGs and the similarity to real life, and if lessons can be extrapolated.  A big thing I have been stuck on, is why does work generally suck where we ‘grind’ our lives away, but in an RPG we suffer the grind for some reward at the end.  What is the difference, what is the reward at the rpg end that we enjoy or at least willingly grind for, whereas in life we try to avoid the grind as much as possible?  I do not have an answer yet, only thoughts.

However, one thing I recently came aware of was if we could ‘hack’ ourselves better gear (money, abilities, items etc) would we, and would it make us happier?  Surprisingly I believe the answer is NO.

Think about this for a moment, I am talking about a substantial increase, like winning the lottery, realizing you are actually twice as strong, you got a surprise new car, anything along these lines.  ‘How could I not be happy?’ well…that is the point.  I think the initial jubilation rapidly, and very rapidly turns to melancholy or disinterest simply because we DID NOT EARN IT.

I recently started a new rpg game, and found out there were hacks where I could instant-kill everyone, never die etc ‘whoa cool’! right?  But in reflection, I was like ‘why the fuck would I do this, it would destroy the fun of the game, and what could be ‘fun’ would turn into something not fun, simply because I had broke the game.’

I have had hacks for games before, and quite frankly they are insanely funny, I remember I had a map hack for DOTA and could completely rape, I have had other instantkill hacks for rpgs etc, and while they are fun…they get old.  And once they are old, you are left with a destroyed game that you do not even want to play legitimately anymore.

In real life I am reminded of college where I worked as a tutor beyond my classes, the work was generally not that hard, but certainly took a lot of time I’d have rather been doing elsewhere, but I saved my money and after a year bought a badass mountain bike I had my eye on.  It was great, I loved that bike with pride…I HAD EARNED THAT SHIT.

I had a very rich friend, and upon seeing my bike, within a week went out and bought a better bike, she was happy riding it around…she had some gear hacked to her basically, she did not grind for it, and within a month that bike was outside, unused and forgotten.

Now, I am not saying to go grind for 7$ an hour, but I am saying it is ALL the difference between earning something, and being given something.  That by being given it, we inherent value it less, and may make the rest of our life worse.

This is a pretty high level lesson here, abandon it at your own loss.