For a long time, 26 years I believed that there was nothing fundamentally different from males and females. I had my girl friends, and my guy friends. Sure we did different things, but we were still friends. Right?
The problem is, when you see them every day its easy to stay ‘friends’ but in this world of constant attention as soon as you are gone, you are forgotten. This lesson has been so painfully pounded into my head over and over. There were girls I was ‘good’ friends with, there were girls I had slept with, and barring one crazy one not a single one of them ever contacted me after I stopped contacting them.
With guys there is a bit of a brotherhood, you have not heard from someone in a while, you call them, in fact it is really easy to determine who are still your friends by the simple litmus test of if they would ever call you.
I am recalling one girl, kind of a whore, who I was good friends with. Once I was at her house, she had just broken up with her guy, she was crying to me, and there was a single moment where I knew I could kiss her. But that wasn’t the ‘nice guy’ thing to do, her she was crying to me, how could I take advantage of her? I’d show her what a great guy I am.
Ironically, despite 5 years of friendship, I never heard from her again even though I tried calling her. It was alarming to me that had I gone for it, it would have happened, and I’d probably still be ‘friends’ (with benefits) with her today instead of just another girl cast to the side.